Friday, September 27, 2013

3 Important Tips to Grow as a Christian Woman, Wife and Mom


Have you ever felt that you had it all together? That there wasn't any room for growth in your life?
If you answered "No, never!" then this post is for you sister (so, pretty much it's for all of us, right?).

We know that we can never be perfect, so our goal should never be perfection ... but we can be better.
So, today I'm sharing 3 things I've found to be of importance for growth as a Christian woman, wife and mom.

Don't Beat Yourself Up
Do you ever feel like your failing? Me too; sometimes, in some areas. We all are. Each of us has strong areas and weak areas, but there's no need to beat ourselves up over it. Instead, we should use those things we do best to bless others (there's your Titus 2 opportunity!) while being honest with ourselves and working on the areas we need to strengthen. When I was a new Christian and wife I also became a stay at home mom when I was used to working full time and being a single mom. I didn't know what a biblical marriage looked like or what being busy at home meant. I had to learn that submission wasn't a cuss word, how to cook something other than boxed foods and what to do with the children I wasn't used to spending the majority of my time with! I struggle to keep a tidy place, organization isn't a strong point of mine. However, I'm diligent in my homeschooling and loving my husband and children. I refuse to beat myself up over what I'm struggling with but I don't excuse it either and neither should you. While you're at it, don't compare what you are or aren't good at with others!
  
Be Teachable and Seek to Be Taught
Pride can cause us to be unteachable and allowing someone into our lives to mentor us in those struggle areas can be challenging, but it's a blessing for us and our families and also to the women we allow to minister to us in this way.
Before we go seeking out a woman who we see has a skill we need to develop or who is spiritually more mature, we need to go to our ultimate teacher everyday. Nothing taught me more about being a Christian woman or my role as a wife and mom than God's word.
After seeking Him and praying for guidance, I began seeking a mentor. I had many wonderful women in my life who were strong Christians, amazing wives and mothers and I tried to follow their examples as best I could, but a personal relationship with a mentor is better than trying to emulate the life of someone else simply because what you see of their life looks good. It may be good, but it's theirs. You are a different woman with a different family, so even with a mentor, our goal should be to learn useful skills, take in godly advice and apply it as we are able to our unique situations and families. Aspiring to be someone else isn't true growth, God has a plan for you and created you to be you!
Today there are many blogs out there that make it all the more easy to find teachers. Maybe there are too many; we are bombarded with opinions, advice and peeks into the lives of other women. I love reading the blogs of my sisters in Christ, I have learned so much through them and it's easy access when I need a good recipe, some cleaning tricks or a little encouragement. Yet, it's not the same as a real life mentor teaching you things tailored for you, allowing you to see the not so perfect spots in her life and holding you accountable.
Neither is the same as learning from the Bible and allowing God to work in us and through us.
Seek Him first and forever and be sure what your learning elsewhere matches up with His word and what you feel He is calling you to do!

 Invest in Yourself
I am always reading multiple books at once. Some on marriage, some on health, some on homeschooling, others on homemaking and all on walking with the King. Take the time, money and resources you can to invest in yourself. I know time can be difficult to find but cutting it out of our day to read for growth is beneficial and will allow us to be a blessing. Money spent on resources that allow us to excel in our roles as wives and moms is well spent. So, don't feel guilty about getting away for a weekend retreat to that Christian women's conference or homeschooling conference or even getting some higher quality household items to work with ... oh, and the occasional spa day (your husband will enjoy this too; maybe not initially, but once he sees how relaxed and happy and not to mention gorgeous you are after a trip to the spa or salon, he might want to make it  fairly regular thing!).
So go ahead, invest in yourself as a daughter of the King, wife and mom because it isn't selfish when it will be benefiting others as well. You and your family will be better for it.

Think of yourself as a flower - your favorite kind - and in doing these things you are allowing yourself to be watered, which allows you to grow. None of us have arrived and we won't in this life, but let's not be stagnant sisters, let's always be seeking ways to grow and help others grow!



Devote and SeekDel is the blessed mama of a sweet bunch of beautiful and busy little girls, the wife of one big hearted husband and happily homeschooling while working from home as a writer. Between tea sipping, schooling and spending time with family, you can find her blogging about homemaking, homeschooling and life in general at Devote and Seek, her personal faith-based blog for women.

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